New Defense Minister Announced by President and Chairman Vladik
10 June 2010 § Leave a comment
Field Marshal Imre Vladik, 12, was this morning appointed Minister of Defense.
Revodna, Noon — President and Chairman Vladik today announced the
sudden death suicide resignation of his long-time Defense Minister Gor Grokstern at a morning press conference. President and Chairman Vladik then revealed the appointment of Field Marshal Imre Vladik, the president’s twelve-year old grandson, to replace Grokstern.
“Field Marshal Vladik has served with great distinction both in the Peoples’ Army and the Congress of Peoples’ Deputies for six years,” the president told the reporter from the major news outlets. “His elevation to the cabinet was carefully considered by both myself and the Vice President and Deputy Chairman. Marshal Vladik brings a wealth of military and political experience to the table. I am certain he will be an outstanding Defense Minister from the start.”
Marshal Vladik, the youngest son of President Vladik’s daughter Mika, attended Koskovian State University at age four for a shortened program to earn his doctoral degree in economics, and completed officer training at the Koskovian Peoples’ Army Leadership School at age six, becoming its youngest graduate. That year, Marshal Vladik was elected by the people of his home district to fulfill the seat of former Congresswoman Gerta Ipolosk who accidentally brutally cut her head off while combing her hair. President Vladik approved his promotion to full Field Marshal in 2009.
“I am delighted to accept the position of Minister of Defense for the Peoples’ Free Democratic Republic of Koskovia,” the minister told the reporter at the conclusion of the president’s remarks. “I believe in the dream of socialism, and I look forward to helping the President and all the people of Koskovia achieve that goal.”