Advice from Andre

3 June 2010 § Leave a comment

Revodna, 2:30 p.m. — Major General Andre Palinski, formerly head of the Swift Tribunal Division of the State Security Serivce, recently agreed to answer questions from our readership concerning personal matters. This is part of a new effort on behalf of the Ministry of Information to reach out to the people of Koskovia and help them to understand that Revolutionary Socialist Ideals are applicable to all aspects of one’s life.

A question from Yuri G. in Holska City, Trysk Province:

Dear General Andre,
My wife and I have been married since 1966. We met at our local party meeting in February of that year, and married the following November. We have four children. I work at the Holska City Regional Supply Center as a fourth-level mid-manager of transport; my wife teaches English in Primary School Alpha Six. When we married, she was very beautiful and enjoyed many outdoor activities, as I did. In the last few years, however, she has gained twenty kilos and prefers to stay at home most evenings. How can I work with her in the spirit of socialist brotherhood to revitalize our marriage?

General Andre’s Response:
Shoot her.

More advice will appear in these pages in the following days.

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